Glennon Doyle Melton is the author of Carry on Warrior: The Power of Embracing your Messy, Beautiful Life. The book is comprised of Glennon’s extremely revealing, open, honest and humble personal essays in which she works — and I mean works — through her struggles and weaknesses with parenting and other aspects of her personal life. A recovering addict and a defender of underdogs everywhere, she has a wider mission of banishing the concept of shame (but not accountability) from our heads and replacing this with compassion, love and understanding for ourselves and others. This book helped me reduce the shame I was carrying in my life. (And I am still working on this — a lot.)
Glennon has now spent months promoting her much anticipated new book, Love Warrior., which will be available for purchase in September. The focus of this book is trauma in her marriage (her husband’s infidelity), how it broke her, and the process of separation and reconciliation between her and her husband. The book is described as being about “shameless sex, God, food, drugs, porn and tenderness—and how the dirt and the divine are so often inseparable.” I’ve been looking forward to reading it, for the opportunity to liberate myself from more shame, for the opportunity to open myself more to the “divinity in the dirt.”
Yesterday on her website, Glennon made a shocking public announcement: she and her husband have separated. That she and her husband are separating is a surprising announcement, both given the intensely private and personal nature of that decision and given the work put into the marriage that Glennon has been very open about. The shock of it though is that it comes just weeks before she’s scheduled to go on tour to promote her book about the work of her marriage, Love Warrior.
But this, indeed, seems to be what Glennon is all about: being true to herself, and standing tall in that truth, despite fears of negative consequences, and by so doing encouraging others to do the same.
Below is an excerpt from her announcement on her website, that I found inspiring (emphasis mine):
But what can happen over time is this: You wake up one day and realize that you have put yourself back together completely differently. That you are whole, finally, and strong – but you are now a different shape, a different size. This sort of change — the change that occurs when you sit inside your own pain — it’s revolutionary. When you let yourself die, there is suddenly one day: new life. You are Different. New. And no matter how hard you try, you simply cannot fit into your old life anymore. You are like a snake trying to fit into old, dead skin, or a butterfly trying to crawl back into the cocoon, or new wine trying to pour itself back into an old wineskin. This new you is equal parts undeniable and terrifying.
Because you just do not fit. And suddenly you know that. And you have become a woman who doesn’t ignore her knowing. Who doesn’t pretend she doesn’t know. Because pretending makes you sick. And because you never promised yourself an easy life, but you did promise yourself a true one. You did promise – back when you were putting yourself back together – that you’d never betray you again.
Yours in being true to yourself, acknowledging your fear and standing tall,