Seasons in Life and Recovery

For writers and “recoverers,” I’m sharing some beautiful writing by Laura McKowen about her life journey and journey of recovery from alcohol addiction.  I love that she touches on loneliness, something I can relate to very much in my own life and feel shame about, and mental health and financial crises.  The poetry she refers…

Quick Thoughts

What I’m Doing with my Blog: I’ve added a “Resources” page which is accessible at the top right of the blog. It contains a few items right now, and I will be updating it with resources that I’ve returned to over and over again. Information resources will be listed, as well as resources for relief,…

Walls

In my early adulthood, I was an utterly shattered and lost soul because of the abuse I experienced as a child and growing up in my family home. I had no sense of being worthy and powerful on the inside or of being able to protect myself and my boundaries. I didn’t know I had…

Repost: When You Reach for Help, Are You Loving or Abandoning Yourself?

  I wanted to share this fabulous article by Dr. Margaret Paul (www.innerbonding.com).  Much of her work seems to be focused on finding self-love, rather than trying to “get” someone else to love you.  In this article she talks about what is happening when we ask someone for help.  It is normal, healthy and necessary…

Boundaries are Beautiful

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately about boundaries.  Simply put, boundaries are limits we set in place to protect ourselves and our uniqueness, that let other people know how we will and will not be treated.  (And when we don’t have good boundaries of our own, we tend to trod all over other…

What Happened and What Did Not Happen in Childhood

I couldn’t resist posting a second short video of Gabor Mate today (talking about the work of the psychiatrist, Donald Winnicott).  The following is my synopsis of it: “There are two sources of adult problems stemming from childhood – what happened and what didn’t happen.  The problems of what happened are problems relating to traumas…

Who Do You Protect?

At 50 years old I am struggling with abuse by my parents starting from young childhood and continuing into adulthood. I “kick myself” for not having dealt with this much earlier in my life — in many ways, I’ve suffered so much and I’ve lost so much time.  I kick myself in quotation marks only…

Transplanting

Have you ever had one of those plants that looks like it’s alive, but it’s not really?  It doesn’t necessarily have any brown leaves; some of them could be yellowish when they should be bright green.  But it’s not growing, that plant.  You water it.  But you sort of want to throw it out because…

Doubt

The abuse I endured as a child has impacted me in any number of ways. “Doubt” sums up all of them. In his book, The Great Work of Your Life, Stephen Cope calls doubt the greatest inhibiting factor to a great life. I have to say, this applies to me. It took me eleven years…

Speeding

I am speeding this morning.  And it’s not good. I joined a running group.  I’m supposed to do a run on my own today.  I woke up at 10:30 this morning which has put me behind for my day. I had a fitful sleep last night.  I was restless and awake on and off; my…

Flourish

“flourish: grow or develop in a healthy or vigorous way, especially as the result of a particularly favourable environment.”  

Truth

“I tore myself away from the safe comfort of certainties through my love for truth – and truth rewarded me.”    Simone de Beauvoir